Non-negotiables are one of the systems I use to organize boundaries in my mind. My biggest non-negotiable in my dating life is that my partner MUST be attending therapy, or be dedicated to some sort of healing journey. Undeniably, the act of self improvement is attractive.
I say this because my yoga practice began in therapy. I had been dipping my toes in and out of different treatment paths for years. My life cycled through seasons where I thought I was too well to seek help, seasons where my feelings paralyzed me and seasons where I was emotionally numb. Fast forward to January 2022, I found a new clinical counsellor. A part of me thought I was beginning another failed attempt at getting better, the better part of me saw this as another opportunity to begin again and break this karmic cycle. This counsellor was truly different. Her expertise aligned with me on paper AND in practice. She specifically practiced Somatic Experiencing (which I recommend you all read into).
During our first session together I discovered that she was a yoga teacher. We connected through this shared love of movement. At the time, I used exercise as an outlet (the adrenaline, caffeine-fueled, throw weights around to hard rock type). So when she guided me through breathwork, recommended meditation techniques and encouraged me to slow down (in my mind, in movement, in life) I had a redirecting epiphany; a breakthrough from the cycles my life was repeating. Although I was resistant to the polarity of her practice, the challenge and tangible steps kept me hopeful and committed.
Recommended: Sally Kempton’s “Meditation for the Love of it”
I found yoga asana first. I rediscovered intuitive movement and a flow state that I hadn’t felt since my contemporary dance training years before. I met teachers who spoke through my brain fog, physical agitation and impatience. I was becoming physically stronger and lighter too. I discovered the Bikram, Iyengar and Ashtanga lineages that challenged my body and opened my mind to the SouthEastern sacred tradition of yoga. I fell in love with Vinyasa, the creative sequences and alchemy of disciplines and began to challenge my existing understanding of Yoga in the Western World.
Recommended: Arundhati Baitmangalkar “Let’s Talk Yoga” Podcast
My reality started to envelope my belief in “Movement is Medicine”. I had hobbies, a community and most importantly a positive worldview. My reluctance to the practice faded as I understood the magic of stillness and found a deep state of awareness in slowing down. It didn’t happen quickly, my breakthroughs were spread out within 10 months of shooting blanks in my educational studies, a record breaking amount of panic attacks, quitting jobs, starting new ones, dropping out of university, struggling through outdated relationships, plenty of monotonous days, sometimes weeks and so many new beginnings. I felt lost more often than I felt certain, but now I know there is something really special in getting lost in the process when you are sure about the direction.
To date, I completed my 200hr Yoga Teacher Training December 2022, and have committed to completing my Yoga Therapy (C-IAYT) Certification by February 2025 at the Vancouver School of Healing Arts. I hope, through my story, you can be inspired to take another step forwards in your healing journey.
“You do not have to stay where you were planted. If you are wilting in places that you have the potential to bloom, you owe it to yourself to uproot.” -Sian r.j Wilmot
Your Subtle Bodies 